I'm so happy to be here :)

[Americangirl406]

Hello everyone, my name is Danielle. I'm 24 and I live in Redding, CA (way nor cal). I've been married to my high school sweetie for four years, and we have two cats. They are doing a fine job of being our children for now, I'm in no hurry.

Here's the short version:

I was born and raised Mormon, last September via google I learned it was a fraud and formally resigned. My husband is Christian so guess what I jumped right into after Mormonism? Although I even freaked him out with how zealous I got so quickly.

Im still in the midst of contemplating my folly, but I know a few reasons why I joined Christianity were:
1.) after years of not feeling good enough I thought I could belong to a community that wasn't guit based (saved by grace, not works)
2.) me and hubby could be the same religion and raise our future kids without disagreement on this issue
3.) it was new, exciting, and fun
4.) my new church was very progressive, with anti-religion-youjustneedjesus type messages
This appealed to me very much after the dogma of Mormonism.


So how did I end up here? The last 10 months as a Christian has been one of the biggest struggles of my life. I've never tried so hard. As a Mormon I never tried because they expected perfection, so I just gave up. But Christianity expected me to heal, to dig up every problem that ever occurred, and "give it to Jesus" . And there is a demon for everything. Every bad thought and temptation is Satan. I realized a week or two ago I felt the EXACT same as I did as a Mormon. Still felt guilty, like an outsider for using my brain and not having holy spirit experiences, still felt distant and abandoned by God. Then I had a dangerous, wonderful thought: what would it be like to have my thoughts all to myself? To not think that god hears every mundane thing I think throughout my day? And to have "satan" off my back, no longer the culprit for every move that could lead me away from god. Satan is the ultimate cop out isn't he? He's the default when religious people don't understand something " Satan is trying to confuse us, he's crafty, he can make a lie seem like truth". Meanwhile this scare tactic keeps us in bondage.

I haven't even admitted the word atheist to myself yet. I'm rolling it around in my brain first. The idea of being myself, just me, without guilt and expectations and forced feelings, I cannot
describe the feeling. I am estatic.

And yes, that was the short version

[xSilverPhinx]

Welcome!

Sounds like a lot of wasted energy you've been pouring into Christianity.

The whole satan as a cop-out has always been interesting to me, there must be more profound reasons why it's something that's so used and over-used for virtually anything. I've never been a theist so I really don't understand that thinking, seeing satan as something real like that, as they do.

[The Magic Pudding]

Hello.

If you do find the need to return to religion I operate an easy going cult.  The rules aren't too demanding and you are only obliged to contribute 8% of your income. 

[xSilverPhinx]

Hello.

If you do find the need to return to religion I operate an easy going cult.  The rules aren't too demanding and you are only obliged to contribute 8% of your income. 

At first I saw 88 there, must've been the % I'm not that greedy, I know it.

[Tank]

I haven't even admitted the word atheist to myself yet. I'm rolling it around in my brain first. The idea of being myself, just me, without guilt and expectations and forced feelings, I cannot describe the feeling. I am estatic.

And yes, that was the short version

Hello Danielle

Congratulations on finding your way out from the oppression of Institutionalised Superstition (aka Religion)

Thanks for making the effort to sign up and join in.

Welcome to HAF.

Regards
Chris

Notes for new members.
The Rules.

Users who comply with forum rules will graduate to full membership after 10 posts.
Till that time your ability to post is limited to the "Getting to Know You" section of the forum.
It is our hope that this small restriction improves the overall atmosphere of HAF.

Some threads you might find interesting.
Where did you get your username from?
10 Things About Yourself
Tell us A Bit About Where You're From
Photography
Non-religious pet peeves
Pets...what do you have?
Favorite Song, with video
How to tell your family you are an atheist.*
"Rules for Conducting a Discussion" by Dr. Mortimer J. Adler*

*You will need 10 posts before you can add a post to this thread, but you can read it at any time.

[OldGit]

Welcome, Danielle.  You will find companionship and help here.  It's good to hear you're free; hopefully you can maintain that without upsetting your husband.

[Stevil]

The idea of being myself, just me, without guilt and expectations and forced feelings, I cannot describe the feeling. I am estatic.

I presume some people just need rules to live by, they need someone to tell them how to behave, what is moral, what is not.
Making decisions for one's self can be overwhelming for some whom may dwell on the guilt of making the wrong decision.

As an atheist you have no moral guider, no scriptures, no teachings, you can't bestow responsibility for your own "sins" onto Jesus. You have to become an independant adult and take control of your own life, be responsible and take accountability for your own actios. But you must also be patient and forgiving on yourself, of course you will make mistakes, that's part of life, nobody's perfect.

[AnimatedDirt]

Hello everyone, my name is Danielle. I'm 24 and I live in Redding, CA (way nor cal). I've been married to my high school sweetie for four years, and we have two cats. They are doing a fine job of being our children for now, I'm in no hurry.

Here's the short version:

I was born and raised Mormon, last September via google I learned it was a fraud and formally resigned. My husband is Christian so guess what I jumped right into after Mormonism? Although I even freaked him out with how zealous I got so quickly.

Im still in the midst of contemplating my folly, but I know a few reasons why I joined Christianity were:
1.) after years of not feeling good enough I thought I could belong to a community that wasn't guit based (saved by grace, not works)
2.) me and hubby could be the same religion and raise our future kids without disagreement on this issue
3.) it was new, exciting, and fun
4.) my new church was very progressive, with anti-religion-youjustneedjesus type messages
This appealed to me very much after the dogma of Mormonism.


So how did I end up here? The last 10 months as a Christian has been one of the biggest struggles of my life. I've never tried so hard. As a Mormon I never tried because they expected perfection, so I just gave up. But Christianity expected me to heal, to dig up every problem that ever occurred, and "give it to Jesus" . And there is a demon for everything. Every bad thought and temptation is Satan. I realized a week or two ago I felt the EXACT same as I did as a Mormon. Still felt guilty, like an outsider for using my brain and not having holy spirit experiences, still felt distant and abandoned by God. Then I had a dangerous, wonderful thought: what would it be like to have my thoughts all to myself? To not think that god hears every mundane thing I think throughout my day? And to have "satan" off my back, no longer the culprit for every move that could lead me away from god. Satan is the ultimate cop out isn't he? He's the default when religious people don't understand something " Satan is trying to confuse us, he's crafty, he can make a lie seem like truth". Meanwhile this scare tactic keeps us in bondage.

I haven't even admitted the word atheist to myself yet. I'm rolling it around in my brain first. The idea of being myself, just me, without guilt and expectations and forced feelings, I cannot
describe the feeling. I am estatic.

And yes, that was the short version

If I may, you mention saved by grace and not by works, but it seems you don't believe this as your words betray this.  You were trying to do what?  Being a Christian is not about attaining a certain point of 'goodness'.  Being converted to Christianity does not (should not necessarily) be a point where your life makes an immediate 180.  The changes in one's life don't all happen at the moment one is converted ( although for some it may ).  They are gradual.  Salvation is immediate, but Sanctification is a life-time process that never ends, is never finished this side of life.

Healing comes to some faster than others.  But healing is ever present in that we still live in a world that sin is still present.  We are human...imperfect humans that make mistakes.

We are to use our brains.  If God created us, our brains are to be used and to think things through.  God says, "Come, let us reason together."  This means we can talk to God and tell Him how we feel, our frustrations even our anger.  There is no minimum number of 'holy spirit experiences' that crosses one from non-Christian to Chrisitian or new Christian to 'better' Christian...  Our experiences differ.  I've never had a 'holy spirit experience' that I can say, "The HS spoke to me and...".  I CAN say that in hindsight, I've seen how God has worked in my life here and there, but in the moment, I've not been able to tell.

I respect your position today and am not trying to do anything but clarify at least from my position as a Christian.

I would disagree with Stevil;

As an atheist one does have a moral guider.  The society one chooses to live in.

The scriptures are the laws of this society.

The teachings are those ideals one embraces and nurtures.

I would agree with Stevil;

You can't bestow responsibility for your own sins onto Jesus, but He will take them.

You have to become an independant adult and take control of your own life, be responsible and take accountability for your own [actions]. But you must also be patient and forgiving on yourself, of course you will make mistakes, that's part of life, nobody's perfect.

     

[Recusant]

Hello and welcome to HAF, Danielle. It sounds like this past year has been one of fairly intense religious turmoil and searching for you. Maybe by talking about your thoughts and questions with folks here, you can find your way to calmer waters. As AnimatedDirt's post above shows, we aren't all atheists here; you won't get just one perspective on issues, not to mention the fact that atheists generally have a wide range of opinions on any given topic.

I hope that you enjoy your time reading and posting here.

[Ali]

Hi Danielle, and welcome!  I hope you enjoy your time here.  I'm glad that you were able to throw off the old guilt and bondage of religion, to come to the beautiful freedom of a life that is your own.    I have to ask though, does your husband know?

[Americangirl406]

If I may, you mention saved by grace and not by works, but it seems you don't believe this as your words betray this.  You were trying to do what?  Being a Christian is not about attaining a certain point of 'goodness'.  Being converted to Christianity does not (should not necessarily) be a point where your life makes an immediate 180.  The changes in one's life don't all happen at the moment one is converted ( although for some it may ).  They are gradual.  Salvation is immediate, but Sanctification is a life-time process that never ends, is never finished this side of life.

Healing comes to some faster than others.  But healing is ever present in that we still live in a world that sin is still present.  We are human...imperfect humans that make mistakes.

Hi I was frustrated because I couldn't wrap my brain around being saved by grace only because if I just decided to be myself and not focus on God and do this, do that, (works), God wasn't there. This has led me to believe that its all in my head. Something true shouldn't only be evident when I'm making an effort to focus on it. It should just always be there.

I wasn't expecting a 180 but I was expecting to feel somethingI was trying to fit in and be happy like everyone else seemed to be I know everyone has problems etc, but when people gush about the holy spirit it was like I was the only one not included. It was like a magic show where I was the only one not fooled by the trick. I wasn't trying to be perfect, that's why I left Mormonism. But in the end I still felt like one.

@ Ali: yes I told my hubby last night. He was very open and supportive and even said he wanted me to share my research with him as I go along.

[Asmodean]

I'm not that greedy, I know it.

Why hello there!  Asmo the Great and Terrible Gray Lump atcha service. It's common knowledge that Asmoism is the only true way to heaven and pleasing The Gray One only costs a yearly fee of 11% of your income.

As for The Pudding's bill... He doesn't have a Mass Sacrifice Machine, you know, so you don't have to pay that... Unless you are allergic to various members of Australian fauna and/or are terrified of hats.

[jumbojak]

I cannot imagine what you are going through. Although I have not held  a belief for many years, I remember what it was like to make the change. A double deconversion sounds almost unbearable! Just know that it gets easier as time goes by, and I think the people here will be able to help. Good folks here.

[Sandra Craft]

I was born and raised Mormon, last September via google I learned it was a fraud and formally resigned. My husband is Christian so guess what I jumped right into after Mormonism? Although I even freaked him out with how zealous I got so quickly.

. . .

I realized a week or two ago I felt the EXACT same as I did as a Mormon.

That brings back memories.  My mother vetted a number of churches when I was a kid and eventually decided on Mormonism.  She had us baptised at the same time and I was even baptised for the dead a few years later.  I didn't realize you could simply resign from it, tho -- I had myself excommunicated.  Resignation would have probably been much easier.

And I must say, you came to your senses so much faster than I did, I'm impressed.  After shrugging off first Mormonism and then Xtianity, I wasted years bouncing around studying Eastern religions and various Pagan and Nature religions before realizing it was all essentially the same thing.  The words of the song might change here and there, but the dance was exactly the same.

[Crow]

If I may, you mention saved by grace and not by works, but it seems you don't believe this as your words betray this.  You were trying to do what?  Being a Christian is not about attaining a certain point of 'goodness'.  Being converted to Christianity does not (should not necessarily) be a point where your life makes an immediate 180.  The changes in one's life don't all happen at the moment one is converted ( although for some it may ).  They are gradual.  Salvation is immediate, but Sanctification is a life-time process that never ends, is never finished this side of life.

Healing comes to some faster than others.  But healing is ever present in that we still live in a world that sin is still present.  We are human...imperfect humans that make mistakes.

We are to use our brains.  If God created us, our brains are to be used and to think things through.  God says, "Come, let us reason together."  This means we can talk to God and tell Him how we feel, our frustrations even our anger.  There is no minimum number of 'holy spirit experiences' that crosses one from non-Christian to Chrisitian or new Christian to 'better' Christian...  Our experiences differ.  I've never had a 'holy spirit experience' that I can say, "The HS spoke to me and...".  I CAN say that in hindsight, I've seen how God has worked in my life here and there, but in the moment, I've not been able to tell.

I respect your position today and am not trying to do anything but clarify at least from my position as a Christian.

I would disagree with Stevil;

As an atheist one does have a moral guider.  The society one chooses to live in.

The scriptures are the laws of this society.

The teachings are those ideals one embraces and nurtures.

I would agree with Stevil;

You can't bestow responsibility for your own sins onto Jesus, but He will take them.

You have to become an independant adult and take control of your own life, be responsible and take accountability for your own [actions]. But you must also be patient and forgiving on yourself, of course you will make mistakes, that's part of life, nobody's perfect.

     

Preaching nonsense.