The End Of The Male

[Whitney]

(most females would rather have a girl than a boy, IMHO).

While I do prefer girls (you can dress them up in cute things) I've had more females tell me they'd rather have boys because it's easier to deal with hyper youngins than emotional trainwreck teenagers.

[Ildiko]

I guess things work differently in Texas. I had joint custody of my two sons and the way it worked was 3 months her - 3 months me and if something came up each of us was there for the other. Expenses worked where we paid into a joint account in function of our respective incomes. If you summed our two incomes and then took the percentages of each and put them into the "kids-expense" fund . That's how it worked. Seemed logical at the time.

That would break up the school year.  Generally, mom gets the kids during school, then dad gets some weekends and some extra time in the summer.  Mom usually has to be a drug-addicted prostitute or worse not to get the primary custodial right. Then dad usually has to pay support. That's how we do it here, even though it's sometimes referred to as "joint" custody.

So it looks as though how you do it there (in Texas?) has serious room for improvement. Please understand that I'm not on the attack here, Bruce. But if this is the "usual" situation then obviously it needs fixing.

Re shared "custody" (horrible word), breaking up the school year is only a problem if the two parents move far apart. If they stay in the same town, city, whatever, then that particular problem goes away. And in my experience, many divorced parents do their very best to cooperate about this.

The whole premise of this thread seems to be that women are out to wipe you out. Honestly, Bruce, we're not!

[Ildiko]

While I do prefer girls (you can dress them up in cute things) I've had more females tell me they'd rather have boys because it's easier to deal with hyper youngins than emotional trainwreck teenagers.

I have no preference at all, but looking back at myself as a teenager I know exactly what you mean! 

[Ecurb Noselrub]

The whole premise of this thread seems to be that women are out to wipe you out. Honestly, Bruce, we're not!

No, I'm not suggesting any evil intent. I'm just thinking about the long term effects of subtle choices.  If things start tending like I'm suggesting, males will certainly be in the minority, and except for Tank's idea about rare things having value, there would theoretically be nothing to stop the complete demise of the unfair sex.

[DeterminedJuliet]

I still think the idea that women who get divorced are financially better off than the women who stay married is a bit silly.

I'd like to see some stats on the average income for single moms vs. single dads, I think those would be pretty telling.

[Whitney]

It would actually be a good thing if one gender were a minority...population control!  But we naturally tend to run about even and I don't see that changing; especially when you look worldwide.

[Xjeepguy]

Speaking from experience here, as my oldest is not my wife's biological child, the system is (at least in the US) heavily biased toward the woman. During the custody battle, I was told by my lawyer that unless I had a picture of my ex smoking crack or murdering someone, I could forget ever getting custody. My child support payments were established to just shy of half my net pay, and I was not allowed to see my child but 2 days every two weeks. I am not a bad father, nor was I a bad companion. She found someone else and left me, and yet she held (and for two and a half more years still does) all the cards. To make matters worse, my daughter wants to live with me, and in the state she lives in will take that into consideration, but she is not allowed to choose which parent she wants to live with, even though she is 15 yrs old.

She has since married a man who makes twice what I make, lives very well and what I have to pay remains the same despite the fact I live in poverty. So there is definatly a fairness issue when it comes to breakups in this country.

[Ecurb Noselrub]

Speaking from experience here, as my oldest is not my wife's biological child, the system is (at least in the US) heavily biased toward the woman. During the custody battle, I was told by my lawyer that unless I had a picture of my ex smoking crack or murdering someone, I could forget ever getting custody. My child support payments were established to just shy of half my net pay, and I was not allowed to see my child but 2 days every two weeks. I am not a bad father, nor was I a bad companion. She found someone else and left me, and yet she held (and for two and a half more years still does) all the cards. To make matters worse, my daughter wants to live with me, and in the state she lives in will take that into consideration, but she is not allowed to choose which parent she wants to live with, even though she is 15 yrs old.

She has since married a man who makes twice what I make, lives very well and what I have to pay remains the same despite the fact I live in poverty. So there is definatly a fairness issue when it comes to breakups in this country.

This is not an uncommon story in the US.  As an attorney, I've seen a hundred stories like this.  Again, my premise is that marriage is not a rational choice for men any longer, and as a result, women will eventually gain full control over the reproductive process, and this will eventually lead to more females being born than males, and over time, will result in male extinction.  It's a stretch, I know, but I did a poll of all the women in my office today, and a clear majority said if they had a chance to only have one child, it would be a female.  Eventually, with population heading toward over 10 billion by the end of the century, curbs on child birth such as exist in China will become more prominent.  Advantage - female.

[Whitney]

It is easier for women to get custody of the child...even if the father is an obvious better fit to the people who actually know both parents. But that kind of favoritism to the mother does vary by state and seems to be more predominate in southern areas who's conservative values make them lean that way.

But to think that women just go around divorcing their husbands because it is easy is ridiculous.  It's also ridiculous to think that most women would go around aborting all their boys just waiting to have a girl....even in places where abortion is forced they want boys not girls (and that's probably because placing women in a role where they are forced to have medical procedures performed on them makes them less of a person than men leading to their being less valued).

[xSilverPhinx]

Speaking from experience here, as my oldest is not my wife's biological child, the system is (at least in the US) heavily biased toward the woman. During the custody battle, I was told by my lawyer that unless I had a picture of my ex smoking crack or murdering someone, I could forget ever getting custody. My child support payments were established to just shy of half my net pay, and I was not allowed to see my child but 2 days every two weeks. I am not a bad father, nor was I a bad companion. She found someone else and left me, and yet she held (and for two and a half more years still does) all the cards. To make matters worse, my daughter wants to live with me, and in the state she lives in will take that into consideration, but she is not allowed to choose which parent she wants to live with, even though she is 15 yrs old.

She has since married a man who makes twice what I make, lives very well and what I have to pay remains the same despite the fact I live in poverty. So there is definatly a fairness issue when it comes to breakups in this country.

This is not an uncommon story in the US.  As an attorney, I've seen a hundred stories like this.  Again, my premise is that marriage is not a rational choice for men any longer, and as a result, women will eventually gain full control over the reproductive process, and this will eventually lead to more females being born than males, and over time, will result in male extinction.  It's a stretch, I know, but I did a poll of all the women in my office today, and a clear majority said if they had a chance to only have one child, it would be a female.  Eventually, with population heading toward over 10 billion by the end of the century, curbs on child birth such as exist in China will become more prominent.  Advantage - female.

I think a lot more would have to change in the world for the world population to lean much more towards females. You're basing this on what women in developed countries think, because there isn't the heavy social pressure to have male children (so that they can in turn look after their parents) that exists in places such as Asia and Africa.

[Ecurb Noselrub]

It is easier for women to get custody of the child...even if the father is an obvious better fit to the people who actually know both parents. But that kind of favoritism to the mother does vary by state and seems to be more predominate in southern areas who's conservative values make them lean that way.

But to think that women just go around divorcing their husbands because it is easy is ridiculous.  It's also ridiculous to think that most women would go around aborting all their boys just waiting to have a girl....even in places where abortion is forced they want boys not girls (and that's probably because placing women in a role where they are forced to have medical procedures performed on them makes them less of a person than men leading to their being less valued).

I'm not really ascribing any evil intent to women. I think it's just more of a natural process - women will gain more and more control over the reproductive process, and will, gradually, have more female children than male children - even if the reason is because they like to dress them up in frilly clothes.  Over time, this slight advantage will be significant.

[Ecurb Noselrub]

I think a lot more would have to change in the world for the world population to lean much more towards females. You're basing this on what women in developed countries think, because there isn't the heavy social pressure to have male children (so that they can in turn look after their parents) that exists in places such as Asia and Africa.

This is a valid observation, and this fact will probably work to delay the ultimate domination of women for a hundred years or so.  But eventually, the sort of conditions that now exist in the West will predominate, and women will be in control of reproduction worldwide.  Advantage - female.

[Attila]

This system where the wife gets all the money and custody of the kids is alien to my experience. Do they not have joint custody where you are? And don't women earn their own money?

There is such a thing as joint custody, but women more often than not, even in joint custody, get to determine where the child lives, so dad gets some weekends, etc.  Yes, women earn their own money. But when dividing up property owned by the couple, the wife will more often than not come out ahead. Furthermore, it will usually be the man paying child support to the woman.

I guess things work differently in Texas. I had joint custody of my two sons and the way it worked was 3 months her - 3 months me and if something came up each of us was there for the other. Expenses worked where we paid into a joint account in function of our respective incomes. If you summed our two incomes and then took the percentages of each and put them into the "kids-expense" fund . That's how it worked. Seemed logical at the time.

That would break up the school year.  Generally, mom gets the kids during school, then dad gets some weekends and some extra time in the summer.  Mom usually has to be a drug-addicted prostitute or worse not to get the primary custodial right. Then dad usually has to pay support. That's how we do it here, even though it's sometimes referred to as "joint" custody.

We lived in the same city (Montréal) and it took about 2-3 hours tops to get them settled after a move. No break up of the school year. But maybe schooling is different in Texas. My ex and I worked out the terms of our divorce together (the city provided a free legal clinic to help couples in non-contested divorces). Joint custody was a no-brainer and very typical for the area. Texas sounds like I living hell.

[Stevil]

I still think the idea that women who get divorced are financially better off than the women who stay married is a bit silly.

I'd like to see some stats on the average income for single moms vs. single dads, I think those would be pretty telling.

Financially sometimes woman are better off divorcing. My dad gives my mum an allowance, I also have a friend of mine that does that to his wife.
FFS people, if you are married you are a team, regardless of whom earns the most. If you decide to split, the law will divide it up straight down the middle, unless of course there is a prenup'

[Tank]

Speaking from experience here, as my oldest is not my wife's biological child, the system is (at least in the US) heavily biased toward the woman. During the custody battle, I was told by my lawyer that unless I had a picture of my ex smoking crack or murdering someone, I could forget ever getting custody. My child support payments were established to just shy of half my net pay, and I was not allowed to see my child but 2 days every two weeks. I am not a bad father, nor was I a bad companion. She found someone else and left me, and yet she held (and for two and a half more years still does) all the cards. To make matters worse, my daughter wants to live with me, and in the state she lives in will take that into consideration, but she is not allowed to choose which parent she wants to live with, even though she is 15 yrs old.

She has since married a man who makes twice what I make, lives very well and what I have to pay remains the same despite the fact I live in poverty. So there is definatly a fairness issue when it comes to breakups in this country.

This is not an uncommon story in the US.  As an attorney, I've seen a hundred stories like this.  Again, my premise is that marriage is not a rational choice for men any longer, and as a result, women will eventually gain full control over the reproductive process, and this will eventually lead to more females being born than males, and over time, will result in male extinction.  It's a stretch, I know, but I did a poll of all the women in my office today, and a clear majority said if they had a chance to only have one child, it would be a female.  Eventually, with population heading toward over 10 billion by the end of the century, curbs on child birth such as exist in China will become more prominent.  Advantage - female.

Sorry but have you not noticed that there are 50 million excess males in China because of their one child policy. Have you not noticed a little country called India that will become the most populous country before to long and the value the mother's place on having a son. Have you not noticed Islam and it's male biased attitude and rate of growth. Bruce you really are taking a parochial American view of this. Yes the American male may be an endangered species but males in general? I doubt it.

Having said that can you imagine a world populated just by women? There probably wouldn't be any wars, it would be very neat and tidy, but can you imagine the bitching and the waste of resources on shoes and handbags!